So with that, my first post doesn’t really have much to do with natural living, cooking, or anything of that sort, but a lesson that I’d like to pass on, and that has to do with following your Momma instinct. I consider myself a professional worrier. And I mean that, I am GOOD at worrying. I’d like to say that I hand things over to God to rest in His peace, that He is control but I’d be lying to you. While I do take things to our loving Father, I am quick to snatch it back and sit with that worry.
However, that’s not really what I’m talking about. What I’m talking about is that nagging feeling that you just can’t shake. I’m telling you that if you have that feeling you shouldn’t want to shake it, you want to be all over that feeling like a toddler jumping into a fresh mud puddle.
My youngest guy has provoked that feeling in me many times and I shoved it aside too often, I’m embarrassed to say. Since he came into this world I’ve known he was quite different than my oldest. While my oldest was probably the easiest baby that was ever invented, Little J was quick to prove that he indeed was his own person. He loved to be held and really wanted nothing to do with his swing, bouncy seat or pretty much anything that didn’t involve me holding him. That was quite okay with me being as I waiting a long time to have him in my life. But, something was always ‘different’
Little J has always been my squishy baby. I just loved holding my newborn pile of mush. I felt like he just melted on me. As time went on, this didn’t really change. We would joke about his big belly and how it seemed like he has to work hard to sit up because of it. It’s hard not to compare your children and I really tried not to but my oldest was born one big, long, lean muscle and to this day is tall, thin and muscular. His little brother was the polar opposite.
Little J hit all of his milestones within the ‘normal’ window of things but something just wasn’t right. Before crawling he rolled everywhere. And not just rolled around, he would point himself to where he wanted to be and some how manage to roll there. Then, when it was time pull himself up, he seemed to use his upper body more than his legs. I thought this was strange but others reassured me that ‘all kids are different’. Yeah, I know they are but deep down I knew this was the wrong kind of ‘different’.
Due to some circumstances that were beyond my control, my attention was divided and not 100% focused on my children when little J began walking. Like all parents, we rejoiced to see his few staggering steps and laughed as he swung a light sabre while doing it. He had that drunken sailor look and I just loved seeing the pride in his face that he was finally doing it. But, because I was busy with a few things I ignored the feeling that his walk should be improving faster or maybe I would have noticed that he couldn’t run, even though he was trying to.
Again, circumstances changed and my attention was back on my sweet guys. It was really at that time that I stopped listening to others reassurances that he was ‘just fine’ and decided that I needed to push for some answers for my little guy.
I really could go on and make this an even longer post than it is already but the point being that when I FINALLY woke up to my feelings we found out that Little J did need some help and that I wasn’t crazy. While his problems are now minor and we are very blessed to be on the right path with his therapies, I wish that I hadn’t ignored my gut feeling.
I promise I’ll share how little J is doing and why I am a HUGE advocate of proper alignment for the body in future posts. I really just want to tell you to not ignore your feelings as a mom. I know we all worry, I do, but I can tell you that this feeling is different from than. I can tell you that you will know that feeling. I can also tell you that you won’t regret investigating those feelings. Peace of mind is a small price to pay when it comes to our children.